Efforts & Tribulations

Goodness by definition is weakness. You cannot seek what is better in the heart without succumbing and occasionally falling short of the realities and unforeseen natures of the world, and the different aspects of life that there are… including that which is not truly life. Goodness is a vulnerability. When a human being offers themselves in hopes of love, wholesomeness, purity, and that which is good, in that given moment they are curtailing the right to be stable and nurtured in the presence of their peers and of the universe. It is a choice made. And it is the choice of the recipient to reciprocate.

A human being cannot be completely whole utterly unto themselves in the presence and abundance of life. It is only necessary to equate true completion from the faces that surround you, the lives you touch, and to consequently learn otherwise. The blessing of a human being is our own unique individual interpretation and our own unique individual experience. It is our ability to transcend basic animal instinct, basic means of survival and staying alive; that precious balance of what is inherent to us as a species and that which we choose to make apart of us, our whole selves. Our animal selves, our physical bodies may be in a constant state of deterioration after some point, emphasizing the pungent reminder of the sanctity of now, and as we collect those pieces we bring into our lives in whatever it is we are pursuing, the great joy of being a human is our interpretation of what it means to be truly alive. And there is something entirely special about the human experience, knowing that you’re alive, being fully conscious of that, and then being able to share it. You don’t find completion by conquering the world, rather seeing it grow.

People often mix this up when they are young, seeking out validation and assurance, trying to find completion in someone else, or actually trying to have someone else complete them, rather than growing on a path and sharing in a journey. This is a false path to take. This is a blind path to take. You can’t truly build yourself up or find completion by using someone else, or through certain external events. Completion doesn’t come at the expense of others or through the effort of others. You can be lifted. You can be raised up. You can find great momentum, personal growth and gain from others. On occasion others may even help to remind you who you are. But any quest or trying to obtain completion because of someone else will lead to the heart forgetting itself, and obstruct you from seeing your real self.

We are engrained and nurtured with whatever it is we will need as children. Children naturally reside in frequencies of joy and love. You never see a child worried about who they are or what their place is in this world. Children are quick to share, they’re naturally brave, and their innocence allows them to naturally see the world through a lens of wonder and fairness. You can always learn from a child because their view of life hasn’t been altered by time and the world, and they still see everything with a sense of pure light. All children really want to do is smile, play, and have fun. The knowledge of that baseline is the foundation and compass for what we need to return to security and wholeness. That is the core of what makes up who we are. And just as a child cannot survive and is dependent upon those around them, their friends and care givers, we as adults find new meaning and deepen our identity through those around us as well. And through relationships, by touching and enriching those around us as mature adults we end up finding the notes we need that fulfill who we are by the layers we bring to those relationships. Simply put it is the addition we bring to ourselves by the addition we bring to others, not the additions others bring to ourselves, or what we think they can bring. A lot of times that looks more like what we can subtract from others and add to ourselves. That belief in the idea that other humans can complete you or serve to make you whole will corrupt and stray us away from what our natural path is suppose to be.

See life as a play or epic film that only you can play the part in. Like a play or movie, there’s action and dialogue, but neither is complete without the score and the music added into it. You might be able to determine the dialogue and the action to some degree, but the music is matched to the scene. And if you’re making a great film, and you’re crafting a magnificent scene that flows in sequence and everything works and runs almost flawlessly, a beautiful score will not only enhance but also take the scene to another level where it seems as though it couldn’t be any better. You’re the star. You’re the green light on production. You carry with you all the goals and motivations of the character. That score follows you and everything you do. If you want to tell the best story and have a complete and whole finished product at the end that is loved and cherished, then the character must provide value and make contributions along the way that lend to a score and soundtrack that you can’t do without, where the movie isn’t the same and couldn’t be imagined without it. You’re the star. (You’re also the writer and lead creative visionary, or director.) Your life is the movie. The music is what makes the entire thing go. It’s the Life that is in your life. Your relationships, your loved ones, the notes and reflections that allow you to grow and that carry you to where you otherwise wouldn’t have known. We all deserve and are meant to have our own good ending. Neither the music or the scene is what is meant without the other, but the star can only enhance the music by sharing and providing his own individual characteristics and contributions that are entirely unique unto himself. When these contributions enhance and bring value to that which is around him, then the music that is reflected back will make and shape for a production that is full and complete. One that is enjoyed thoroughly, and not made in vain, adding its own special note to the overall greater production.

Karma is not a sure bet. It’s not the end all and be all, might not even be there. What goes around, does not necessarily come around. The Universe does not work to be just or to tie loose ends. I have not found this to be so. The Universe functions to serve. It’s there for you, It serves and provides the most dynamic platform there is for you to find yourself, your niche, and to try to be as good as you wish or can be. Don’t lose faith in beyond that. Life is beautiful. That’s how it’s suppose to be. Luck is not a sure thing. It’s not the reliable source that makes your life what it is. It’s barely even there if that’s how you want to see it. Again, it is something that’s there for you. It amplifies; both good luck and bad luck. What is there to rely on is the guidance, realities, communications, and efforts in your own life. Don’t succumb to the idea of misfortune. Hold on! Life is extraordinary. That is how it’s suppose to be. Fortune is a personal idea in which we emphasize and can determine our own worth, wealth both in terms of literal monetary assets, as well as wealth you can’t usually count on a spread sheet, like your friends or the abundance, or lack there of, in your life. It is also a myth. Many things, including people, can bring you relief. Nothing can bring you peace, but yourself. Nothing can determine your worth, your value, make the final assessment on you, other than you, and perhaps the Real God, Creator of All. It is the idea and the effort attached of providing and instilling hope, love, etc. in the arenas outside of yourself that can make life truly beautiful, and is ALWAYS worth trying, no matter who, what, when, where, why, or how. It is the driving force behind this effort and any effort you bring forth that either keeps your head held up, or looking at your feet, regardless of any outcome or result, and your means to navigate that within yourself. The world is upheld by the will and veracity of good people. The day you stop trying and give up, is the day you lose what is sacred and what is also entirely beautiful unto you, and you alone.

Fear chokes the imagination love and security hope to build. Paranoia suffocates the will to seek that hope, and our intention to do what is right.

“Catastrophizing is an irrational thought a lot of us have in believing something is far worse than it actually is.” pyschcentral.com While this is a natural distorted way of thinking we all do, when you allow yourself to drift away from the principles and institutions inherently natural to you, and begin to shrink your world with negative thought, the more helpless you will become to cope with and overcome all the real possibilities this world and the universe will inexorably offer, both bad and good.

Fear is an absence, and in that absence we sometimes lose the clarity to know our real way, and what our path should be. And at these times, we must call upon the most innate resources of our being: our instincts and intuitions; for within this level of our being reside our most locked, secure, and fortified tools. Those in which thought cannot corrupt and suffering cannot manipulate.

When there is no way and we leave ourselves to rely solely on our nature, we begin to make steps back into the realm of love and goodness, because no human being is born in a natural state of fear. Maybe discomfort, but not fear. No matter what, there is always love, within us and around, and there’s nothing scary or to worry about that. The natural way, the natural path and appetite of a human being is for connection, to connect, not to survive. There is no limit on life, and how dare we diminish that. The only unforgivable sin is to stop trying.

It is a theory in many that the hardened and wicked advance whilst the “nice guys finish last” and such examples have somewhat proven this or showed good reason for this over time. So much so that it has become fashionable to be “bad” or to be a “sinner”. We must, in order to survive and not drown, play and take our part in the unspoken game. But that’s not life. That’s not what life is about. If someone asks, “why are we here? What’s the purpose of life?” The answer isn’t “to move forward and up.” Don’t do that to Life. You might miss the look on that kid or someone’s face that you stopped and helped and decided to offer them something more. You might not see their eyes when they look back at you, and say thank you.

There is a unique foundational place within each of us. It is something we cannot describe, but we know is completely true to us. Something that aligns, lifts our spirits, covers our body, and if nothing else forces us to know who we are. Not only is it where we find our eternal compass, but it is where the great gifts lie that allow us to stand up and authentically challenge this universe we very briefly call home.

These gifts wilt and fade with time if not properly taken care of. And unfortunately it is a great rarity when one “grows up” to keep those gifts and stand by what is perhaps only known to you and utilize them in a way that holds your truth sacred and rises up against the status quo.

Most people die unfulfilled, having forgotten or betrayed those gifts. I cannot say this with certainty because I do not have the years, but I do not believe those gifts ever die. They might wilt, fade, get shunned or lost, but they are the core, the essence of what makes you, you. And as long as you’re living and breathing, there is always a path back.

We make mistakes as humans, but it is never one to search and claim the higher ground that is within. It is a journey that can never be ‘wrong’ and one, if you’re willing, that always prevails.

We have more capacity to love than we can ever know. We will leave behind more unspoken kind words than we ever should. Why is it necessary to wonder how one might receive something, or what the rest of the herd might think, when the sentiment is pure? It is not. Yet we must go through the motions to test if it will fall in the lather of what we deem worthy to actually verbalize.

While I said karma might not even exist, I am a big believer in cause and effect. And the gentle offerings we throw out there NEVER fall in vain. Something as small as a smile flings positivity out and into the universe causing a ripple effect that is absolutely boundless and innumerable. Attached to every act, is the act itself, and the accompanying effect it can have on yourself, others, and the universe. And no act of kindness falls without a positive effect. Even if it’s wasted, mocked, and/or initially unappreciated, it might not be forgotten and it certainly adds up.

Our experience can dictate our capacity and willingness to show kindness and love, but at the end of the day we must NEVER fall short of ourselves and the natural state of who we are. And when we inevitably do from time to time, climb, fight, realign, and allow ourselves the grace to come back into our truth and try again. No human being is born rotten. That label might creep up because of mistakes or dealings with the timid and ignorant or other circumstances. But it is our duty, and we must make sure we find our way back to our center, or bitterly navigate a life without that familiar flavor.

The definition of goodness according to Webster is “the quality or state of being good”. And the definition of good is “of a favorable character or tendency”. There isn’t any struggle without striving to be better, especially when trying to maintain virtue. The good will always be made to struggle and suffer more, simply because they’re trying harder. They have to do so because there is more to live up to, and to live for. By simply being good, you are bestowed with more at stake. The more at stake, the greater the potential. The more value you see, the more value you know. The more meaning you assign, the more meaning there is. The more care you have, the more impact there will be with each and every moment. The more precious Life and all there is is to you, the more wonderful your life and who you are can be. And LIFE… is it anything less than wonderful? It’s not suppose to be. It mustn’t be. Maybe, maybe one day people will start to be better to each other. Imagine all the people living for today, but never forgetting tomorrow. Imagine tomorrow being so beautiful all it does is make sense, and all it is, is good.

And in the meantime, smile! You don’t know what kind of good person is waiting to be better.

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